Dear Future Self,

As I am concerned about you and your family's health, sanity, and sleep patterns (i.e. happiness), I would like to give you some advice for your next move. Please take heed and avoid the following:

-living across the street from a hospital (especially a scary one).
-living on the main street in a large city with many protests/strikes, incessant honking due to bad traffic or sports victories/losses, and a plethora of motorcycles.
-living next to a fire station and/or police station that not only has frequent sirens from cars/trucks, but LOUD emergency alarms throughout the day and night that last way too long.
-living near a city hall that has a curfew alarm, or in a town that requires a curfew?
-construction either on your own building or any in the vicinity.
-neighbors who smoke profusely and/or do not like wearing clothing.
-having to park so close to said neighbors who will probably dent your car when they open their own car door.
-neighbors who tire of their children's crying, then lock them outside of their apartment in the hallway between your apartments for all to appreciate.
-neighbors who are drug dealers and/or are wanted by the police.

Also, please take note that:
-church bells, in moderation, are charming.
-living near a bus route is convenient, living on a bus route is not ideal.

While this list is limited to my own experience and others may have many other ideas, it should help you in finding your next home. I'm always looking out for you.

Sincerely,
Your wise and experienced past self

p.s. Unless something has recently changed, parallel parking is not your cup of tea. So find something with a designated parking spot. Cheers!